GOD PLEASE BRING ME THROUGH THE FIRE

DEAR LORD

HOW HOT DOES THIS FIRE HAVE TO GET

 WHEN WE STARTED THIS JOURNEY

 I SAID I LNEW YOU COULD TURN THIS TO GOOD

 I STOPPED WRITING AWHILE

 TRYING TO DO MY PART

 TO GET WELL

 THIS DISEASE IS CRUEL

 EVERYDAY YOU GET WORSE OR LOSE A LITTLE MORE

PEOPLE IN  IN PT PUSH DO THINGS I USED TO DO WELL

 NOW I CAN;T EVEN DO THAT.

 PRACTICE  LORD DOES NOT MAKE THINGS PERFECY

REMEMBER THE PIANO, I PRACTICED BUT DO NOT GET PERFECT

I KNOW YOU WILL BRING ME THROUGH THIS BUT 

 MY CHILDREN AND FRIENDS SEE YOUR WORK IN ME.

 LORD MY INSIDES ARE BEING RIPPED OUT.

  

 WHAT IS TO HELP ME NEARLY KILLS ME

  I NEED TO LET PEOPLE HELP ME.

I NEED TO PROVE I CAN DO THINGS FOR MYSELF

 THIS CARE IS EXPENSIVE

 I BELIEVED YOU WANTED ME TO HAVE A FEED TUBE

 AND THEN COME TO EGLE

 NOW THEIR IS ANOTHER LEG TO THIS JOURNEY

 BUT I AM NOT DOING SO WELL HERE

MY STOMACH IS SICK AND IT DOESN'T GET BETTER

 I WALK WORSE

I DO NOT TALK AT ALL

 I CAN'T EVEN CHANGE ONE IOTA OF THIS

 SO LORD WHERE ARE YOU

 I NEED YOU 

  

 I HEAR YOU CALL MY NAME 

AND I COME

I AM WILLING TO COME

  I HEAR PEOPLE LIVE FIVE TO TEN YEARS WITH THIS DISEASE

THEY ENJOY LIFE AND THERE CHILDREN 

 I DID YESTERDAY

 I PAINTED WITH SOPHIE AND SHOWED HER HOW TO

 USE NEW PAINT BRUSHES 

AND

NEW PAINT YOU CAN MIX AND MAKE NEW COLORS

 BOY WAS THAT APART OF ME GIVING

TO MY GRAN DAUGHTER, SOPHIE

 THANK YOU LORD

LORD SHOW THIS HUMBLE LIFE CAN GET THROUGH THE FIRE

 AND HAVE PEACE AND JOY

 GET RID OF THIS FRETTING ABOUT EVERYTHING

 I LOVE BRENT 

 GOD HELP HIM GET BACK HIS LIFE BACK

BE WITH RICH AND GREG AND STACY

THEY ARE WORKING SO HARD TO HELP ME

GOD BE WITH BARBARA,

SHE IS FRACTURED BY THIS

GIVE HER COURAGE TO STAND TALL

PLEASE EMBRACE CONNIE

 SHE HAS LOST SO MUCH

 AND WE ARE A TREMENDOUS LOSS TO EACH OTHER

HELP ALL OF US WALK THROUGH THIS FIRE
 

 AFTER THE FIRE WILL THERE BE GREEN GRASS AND GOOD WORDS BETWEEN ALL

MAY THEY REMEMBER ME WITH JOY ,LAUGHTER AND GOOD HUMOR

NOT LIKE THIS SICK FEELING AND TEARS OF DISMAY

GOD I CHALLENGE YOU TO GIVE ALL ALS PATIENTS THIS PEACE

FAMILIES AND LOVED ONES.

 I KNOW YOU CAN MAKE ALL THING FOR THE GRACE OF GOD

  IF YOU CAN'T FOX GIVE A SPECIAL GIFT TO ALL WHO KNEW

 I AM SORRY THIS IS SUCH A BUMMER FOR EVERYONE


 NEW BIRTH WOULD BE A TRMENDOUS GIFT.

 YOU HAVE A FEW OPPORTUNITIES



GOD YOU KNOW ALL THINGS


PLEASE GOD PUT YOUR HEALING HANDS ON MY BODY

 I AM NOT ASKING FOR A HEALING J
UST HELP THEM FIND OUT WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME  AND FIX IT

  

MY DEAREST GOD WHERE IS MY VOICE

MY DEAREST LORD WHERE IS MY VOICE

I MISS MY VOICE

 MOST PROFOUNDLY WHEN SINGING IN CHURCH,

 HYMNS ARE WHAT GAVE ME PEACE

 WHEN MY MOTHER PASSED ON

 I BELIEVE I USED MY VOICE TO BETTER MANKIND

I ALWAYS TRIED TO LEAVE A PLACE A LITTLE BETTER THAN i FOUND IT

THAT WAS VERY METHIDICAL

LIFE IS FRAGILE 

AND PEOPLE NEED TO BE STROKED 

AND TO KNOW THEY ARE ALOUD TO BE REAL.

THAT IS THE REASON I MADE FRIENDS

AT EVERY CRAFT SHOW I WENT TO 

AND

EVERY HOME SHOW I ATTENDED

I KNOW THE LADY AT LIBERTY SCREENS

THE MAN AT THE LITTLE GIANT LADDER

 SOLAR ENEGRY

POCKETBOOKS

JEWLERY

UNIQUE

I GUESS YOU COULD CALL MY VOICE UNIQUE..

IT TAKES PAIN AND FINDS FAITH AND HOPE IN THE SITUATION

THERE WAS REALLY NOT A UNIQUE BIRD LIKE ME

THE WORLD COULD NOT TAKE TWO OF ME.

 NOW THE LITTLEST THING

SAYING THANK YOU TO A NURSE

 COMMENT ARE HER VERY LOVELY AND KIND HANDLING OF MY FEED TUBE,

 WRITING IS A TOOL BUT NO TIME TO READ

A LENGTHY NOTE WRITTEN IN KINDNESS

JOKING WITH PEOPLE IT IS A PLEASANT MORNING IS REDUCED TO A SMILE

WHEN SOME GETS TO KNOW ME THEY AVOID ME FOR THE WRITTEN NOTE. 

tHEN THERE ARE SOME WHO RACE ME DOWN THE HALL AND SPINS ME AROUND.

YOU HAVE TO FEEL A LITTLE MORE TO DO WITH PEOPLE. 

I HESITATE TO DO THINGS IN GROUP

BUT TODAY i WATCHED A VALENTINE MOVIE IN THE MAIN HALL

I SOBBED THE WHOLE MOVIE,

BECAUSE OF THIS DISEASE 

AND

HOW IT DOES NOT LET ME FULLY PARTICIPATE

EVERYONE THOUGHT IT WAS THE SAD MOVIE

BUT I USED A WHOLE BOX OF CLEANEXES

i WENT BACK TO MY SEMI OFFICE AND WROTE MY SON'S

THIS IS NOT GOING TO WORK

IF I COULD TALK I WOULD CALL MY SON'S.

AND TELL THEM HOW I FEEL. 

IT IS VERY FRUSTRATING.

 I ATE IN MY ROOM ALONE AND LAID DOWN AND SLEPT.

  

 I FEEL DRAINED

WITHOUT A VOICE

 WHY LORD SHOW ME THE PURPOSE

I LET SO MANY PEOPLE DOWN

I AM STILL HEAR IN SPIRIT

 BUT IT IS NOT THE SAME. 

 IT IS NOT FLUENT BUT STRAINED

 WHY LORD WHAT AM I TO DO WITH THIS CHALLENGE

BLESSED LORD YOU GIVE SO MUCH

MY BLESSED LORD

I HAVE BEEN GIVEN SO MUCH 

AND

HAVEN'T ALWAYS BEEN GRATEFUL

TAKEN AT LEAST ITEMS FOR GRANTED

 WHY DO WE BUY CLOTHES?

OFTEN TIMES, I WOULD DRESS TO GIVE A LIFT TO A CLIENT

 STUDENT, FRIEND STRANGER

 SOMETIMES EVEN TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER

 WHEN I FELT SAD I WOULD DRESS UP IN MY FAVORITE OUTFIT

 TO MAKE ME SHINE A LITTLE BRIGHTER

 WHEN I SOLD INSURANCE AND WENT IN A PERSONS HOME

 THEY MIGHT NOT SEE ANYONE ALL WEEK BUT ME

 I TOOK THAT VERY SERIOUS

WHEN I WAS A PRAYER PARTNER

 I TOOK MY DRESS AS AN INSTRUMENT OF GOD

 TO BRING LIGHT AND CALM INTO THE ROOM

 

SO NOW LORD 

WHAT DO  I DO WITH ALL THESE CLOTHES

I WON'T NEED THEM

 MAKE-UP

 IT WAS NICE
AND

 NAILS, OH HOW MUCH FUN

 NOW I DON'T LOOK AT NEW OR OLD   

 I JUST AM

THIS IS A PROBLEM WITH HEALTH CONSCIOUSNESS

 I DON'T PAY ATTENTION TO DIETS 

OR THE RIGHT FOOD  

POLITICS I HAVE  BEEN UP ON FOR YEARS

 MILD MANNERED BUT TRUE TO MY BELIEFS

 I ALWAYS TRY MYSELF TO HEAR THE OTHER SIDE AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE

 AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR MY OWN ACTIONS

I AM TRYING TO BE HONEST,

WHEN MY HEART IS CRYING OUT 

 LORD PLEASE HELP ME HANDLE THIS

 WHEN I SEE SOMEONE I HAVEN'T SEEN IN A LONG TIME 

I KNOW IT IS A SHOCK AND I CRY

THAT IS THE REASON I CAN'T GO TO CHURCH,

 IT HURTS TOO BAD

  

ME NOT BEING THE SAME

I HAVE SO MANY THINGS TO DO

 I AM NOT DONE YET 

 LORD HELP ME GET THEM DONE.

 I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND WITH WHAT I DO,

 I WANT TO HONOR YOU

 BY GIVING MY VERY BEST TO THE ONES  I LOVE.

 DEAREST LORD IS THIS WHAT HAPPENS

 WHEN A PERSON GETS A DEVASTATING ILLNESS

THAT THEY LOSE INTEREST

 IN THE THINGS OF MAN

TEACH ME OH LORD
HOW TO BE GRACIOUS WITH THE TIME I HAVE LEFT
FOR THE SAKE OF OTHERS

THERE ARE GOOD PARTS AND BAD PARTS TO EVERYDAY

MY DEAREST LORD

THERE ARE GOOD PARTS AND BAD PARTS TO EVERYDAY

SOME A LITTLE MORE CHALLENGING

THAN OTHERS!

BUT ALL IN ALL WE GET THROUGH THE DAY

  IN ONE PIECE.

 IF WE ARE LUCKY!

LORD I KNOW

YOU ONLY GIVE US A MUCH AS WE CAN BEAR!

I BEG TO DIFFER WITH YOU

LORD I ASK AT THE BEGINNING OF THIS JOURNEY

FOR YOU TO SHOW ME

THE WAY, THE TRUTH,  AND THE LIGHT!

 PEOPLE QUESTION WHY DON'T I GIVE IN

ACCEPT AND BE AT PEACE WITH THIS

ALS

I SEE MY ROOM MATE HAVE USE OF HER VOICE,

 HER HANDS WITH LIMITATION

BUT NEEDS A LIFT TO DO EVERYTHING ELSE IN HER CARE.

I ALREADY CAN NOT SPEAK

 AND THE COURTESIES

SHE SHOWS THOSE WHO CARE FOR HER,

WILL BE MARKEDLY DIFFERENT

WITH ME.

EVEN IF I DON'T GET  ALL 

THAT ALS 

HANDS OUT,

BEFORE I GO  

 IT IS SO MONSTROUS 
FOR THE 
HUMAN MIND TO COMPREHEND

I LOOKED FORWARD TO MOVING TO VIRGINIA

TO HELP RICH AND STACY

 TAKE CARE THE GRAND CHILDREN

AND BE ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF THEM WHEN THEY WERE SICK

DID I BLOW IT?  OR DID YOU?

 MAYBE NEITHER ONE OF US.

 ALS JUST IS

 LORD,

I WANT TO STAY INTERESTED IN THINGS

 BUT THIS ALS

KILLS YOUR SPIRIT

I LOVED THE BEAD PARTY

 BUT THAT WAS JUST A START,

 MY LAST BEAD PARTY.

I WANTED TO FIX ALL MY BROKEN JEWELRY

NOW I WILL LEAVE THAT TO

SOPHIE, STACY AND ANNIE AND BARBARA

WON'T THEY HAVE FUN.

 BUT LORD THAT IS MY PREDICAMENT

 THEY ARE MY PLANS

AND GOD DO YOU REALLY LAUGH

I PLANNED ON NICE CLOTHES 

NOW WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO WITH THEM

I FINALLY GOT MY HOUSE PAINTED THE WAY I WANTED

 BY A GREAT FRIEND

JC

DO THE KIDS KEEP IT

  OR 

SELL IT.

I SEEM TO FEEL INSIGNIFICANT IN THESE DECISIONS!

I LIVE ALONE

 I ALWAYS THOUGHT MY NIGHT IN SHINING ARMOUR

 WOULD SHOW UP AND I COULD BE LIKE

 CONNIE, BARBARA, PAT AND KAREN

 AND 

 HAVE A SECOND LOVE OF MY LIFE

 YOU KNEW I WAS TRUE TO MY FAMILY

 AND INTERVENED

 IN DICK'S HEART 

AND 

GAVE HIM PEACE

 THANK YOU LORD THAT IS THE VERY BIGGEST GIFT

 YOU COULD GIVE OUR SONS

 AND GRAND DAUGHTERS

LORD,

I HAVE NOT LOST INTEREST IN PEOPLE

I HAVE  LOVED  EVERY PERSON I HAVE TOUCHED

 EVEN THE CROOKS HAD SOMETHING GOOD ABOUT THEM

 YOU HAVE TAUGHT ME 

 PEOPLE ARE BASICALLY GOOD!

THANK YOU LORD FOR A PEACEFUL MIND

 YOU HAVE MENDED BRIDGES

 WHERE IT WAS HOPELESS.

YOUR WORK ENDURES FAR BEYOND ME.

MAYBE MY SON'S NEED TO KNOW THEIR MOTHER'S FAITH  

ALTHOUGH SHAKEN IS STILL HANGING ON FOR DEAR LIFE.

  WHY LORD, WAS I GIVEN THE TASK OF ENDINGS?

IT SEEMS THINGS GO IN LIKE A LAMB

 AND MY ENDINGS ARE LIKE LIONS.

I GO KICKING AND STRATCHING 

OUT  OF 

JOBS, SCHOOLS, MARRIAGE

AND CHURCH

 BOY WERE THEY BIG DEALS AND 

BUT

 SHRINK WHEN FACED WITH 

ALS

PLEASE MAKE ALS NOT BE THE LEGACY OF MY LIFE.




























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