Brent and I are communicating with and between GOD. GOD has a hold of us. I am trying to feel safe at home. Where is the ALS community. Is this normal to get really tired and then panic. All ends, frustration and fear. I am just new at this and want to scream. My son Brent, wrote a paper on neurons and is trying to help me figure out what is happening to my body. It is fascinating to combine what I know with what he knows. It is like an orchestra with all the instruments. He went out for a smoke. We are talking about his Dad and me. We are truly "War of the Roses" How to deal with that when you are dying and need help. What can be down when there has been so much pain. The opposite of love is not hate but apathy.. We sure have not had apathy. I don't know why I am writing this. But my son Brent says I would be better where I live. My son Rich, has a place for me with better facilities to help someone with ALS. Everyone including me wants me to go to England to see my brother. I don't know how I travel from DC to Baltimore. Now from DC to Frostburg.. I am afraid of my muscles. I have not seen a doctor yet. Connie my friend is taking me to Morgantown clinic on Thursday.